First things first: Confidence is not bravado, or swagger, or an overt pretense of bravery. Confidence is not some bold or brash air of self-belief directed at others. Confidence is quiet: It’s a natural expression of ability, expertise, and self-regard. It comes as no surprise they all share a number of qualities:
 1. They take a stand not because they think they are always right… but because they are not afraid to be wrong. Cocky and conceited people tend to take a position and then proclaim, bluster, and totally disregard differing opinions or points of view. They know they’re right – and they want (actually they need) you to know it too. Their behavior isn’t a sign of confidence, though; it’s the hallmark of an intellectual bully. Truly confident people don’t mind being proven wrong. They feel finding out what is right is a lot more important than being right. And when they’re wrong, they’re secure enough to back down graciously. Truly confident people often admit they’re wrong or don’t have all the answers; intellectual bullies never do.
2. They listen ten times more than they speak. Bragging is a mask for insecurity. Truly confident people are quiet and unassuming. They already know what they think; they want to know what you think. So they ask open-ended questions that give other people the freedom to be thoughtful and introspective: They ask what you do, how you do it, what you like about it, what you learned from it… and what they should do if they find themselves in a similar situation. Truly confident people realize they know a lot, but they wish they knew more… and they know the only way to learn more is to listen more.
 3. They duck the spotlight so it shines on others. Perhaps it’s true they did the bulk of the work. Perhaps they really did overcome the major obstacles. Perhaps it’s true they turned a collection of disparate individuals into an incredibly high performance team. Truly confident people don’t care – at least they don’t show it. (Inside they’re proud, as well they should be.) Truly confident people don’t need the glory; they know what they’ve achieved. They don’t need the validation of others, because true validation comes from within. So they stand back and celebrate their accomplishments through others. They stand back and let others shine – a confidence boost that helps those people become truly confident, too.
 4. They freely ask for help. Many people feel asking for help is a sign of weakness; implicit in the request is a lack of knowledge, skill, or experience. Confident people are secure enough to admit a weakness. So they often ask others for help, not only because they are secure enough to admit they need help but also because they know that when they seek help they pay the person they ask a huge compliment. Saying, “Can you help me?” shows tremendous respect for that individual’s expertise and judgment. Otherwise you wouldn't ask.
5. They think, “Why not me?” Many people feel they have to wait: To be promoted, to be hired, to be selected, to be chosen... like the old Hollywood cliché, to somehow be discovered. Truly confident people know that access is almost universal. They can connect with almost anyone through social media. (Everyone you know knows someone you should know.) They know they can attract their own funding, create their own products, build their own relationships and networks, choose their own path – they can choose to follow whatever course they wish. And very quietly, without calling attention to themselves, they go out and do it.
 6. They don't put down other people. Generally speaking, the people who like to gossip, who like to speak badly of others, do so because they hope by comparison to make themselves look better. The only comparison a truly confident person makes is to the person she was yesterday – and to the person she hopes to someday become.
 7. They aren’t afraid to look silly… Running around in your underwear is certainly taking it to extremes… but when you’re truly confident, you don’t mind occasionally being in a situation where you aren't at your best. (And oddly enough, people tend to respect you more when you do – not less.) 8. … And they own their mistakes. Insecurity tends to breed artificiality; confidence breeds sincerity and honesty. That’s why truly confident people admit their mistakes. They dine out on their screw-ups. They don’t mind serving as a cautionary tale. They don’t mind being a source of laughter – for others and for themselves. When you’re truly confident, you don’t mind occasionally “looking bad.” You realize that that when you’re genuine and unpretentious, people don’t laugh at you. They laugh with you.
 9. They only seek approval from the people who really matter. You say you have 10k Twitter followers? Swell. 20k Facebook friends? Cool. A professional and social network of hundreds or even thousands? That’s great. But that also pales in comparison to earning the trust and respect of the few people in your life that truly matter. When we earn their trust and respect, no matter where we go or what we try, we do it with true confidence – because we know the people who truly matter the most are truly behind us.
http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20130606150641-658789-9-qualities-of-truly-confident-people?&affiliate=&utm_medium=&utm_source=

SIX LESSONS OF LIFE Lesson 1: Naked Wife A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,… “Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?” Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure. Lesson 2: A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the administration clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.” Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. Lesson 3: A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.” Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity. Lesson 4: A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him,”Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. ...A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up. Lesson 5: Power of Charisma A turkey was chatting with a bull “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree. Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it wont keep you there. Lesson 6: A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Moral of the story: 1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy 2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend 3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut! #FoodForThought

Inspirational Qoute...

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the World. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won’t feel unsure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; is is in everyone. As we let our own Light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” — Nelson Mandela

1O THINGS

SOURCE TechRepublic’s free newsletters.BY Justin James Lead Architect for Conigent. 10 things I love about IT #1: The people The people in IT are an amazing group. IT is a diverse industry, and the people who work in it tend to have a high level of passion for the job. Sure, there are a few mercenaries who are in it just for the money, but they are thankfully relatively rare. Overall, I cannot say enough good things about the people in this industry, and I love working with, around, and for them. #2: The energy The only industry with nearly as much raw energy as IT is marketing, and I don’t find branded pens terribly interesting. IT people are excited about their jobs and excited about the work they are doing. IT as an industry offers enough variety and choices of employers and projects so that there’s no reason for those who love IT to be doing work they hate, once they get past entry level in their career. And it shows in the passion that IT workers bring to the office. Accountants don’t argue about “EBIDTA vs. pro forma” in quite the same way that programmers get worked up over “Java vs. VB.NET.” #3: The education requirement A minority of people in IT have degrees in an IT-related major (computer science, computer engineering, etc.). In fact, a significant portion of people in IT do not have degrees at all. Like the dress code, there is an unwritten assumption throughout much of IT: Experience counts for an awful lot. Sure, there are a few niches in IT where that science and math background is needed. But for average business-level usage, it is not necessary. Add in the fact that the technology becomes obsolete so quickly and the fact that the industry is obviously working just fine without the requirement of a degree, and you have a field that is very welcoming. I challenge you to find another job where people with a high school diploma, some self-taught knowledge, and a good attitude have such a good chance to do well for themselves. #4: The dress code One of the great things about IT is that it grew up in the corporate basement. Way back when, the business folks liked to lock us up in the dungeon and occasionally throw down a bowl of gruel for the nerds. As a result, they didn’t care if we had long hair or beards or pizza stains on our ratty, hardware-vendor T-shirts. Granted, this has changed significantly at most shops. There are now some dress code standards for IT workers. But they don’t seem to be as strictly enforced as they are for the rest of the company. There is an underground, unspoken conspiracy among IT managers that a loosened dress code is practically part of the standard compensation. Sure, if programmers or system administrators really want to come in dressed to the nines, they are welcome to, and no one will knock them for being too GQ. But if your idea of style is less refined, IT as an industry doesn’t mind. #5: The environment Much like the dress code, the environment in most IT shops is fairly informal compared to the typical office. Posters for anime films, books all over the place, whiteboards with goofy cartoon drawings, Nerf ball fights… only when you put a dozen nerds together in the same room with a geek boss (or a boss who “gets” geeks) could this be called a work environment. Yet despite all of that, IT workers tend to put in just as many hours, if not more, than most office employees. We just have a lot more fun with it. #6: The adaptable learning curve In the IT industry, you can do the same tasks day after day if you want to, or you can take a job that is constantly evolving. It is really up to you! Some programmers are still using COBOL after 10 years, and others have used 10 languages in 10 years. Unlike most industries, some areas of IT move slowly enough for those who are not comfortable with regular upheavals, while much of the industry moves quickly enough for those who like a more rapid pace. When you are in IT, you can find a job that fits your style. #7: Flexible work conditions IT is amenable to “flextime” workers and telecommuting. It’s also relaxed about the working hours. IT pros may work a few more hours than the average worker, but that extra time is traded off with some flexibility in when they put in those hours. Indeed, much of IT work occurs after business hours, and there is an unwritten rule in most shops that the workers who do a lot of nighttime/weekend work get some slack on clock-in, clock-out, and lunch times. Most other professions seem to be stuck on 8:00 to 5:00, with a one-hour lunch. If you like a flexible schedule, or prefer to not be in the office on a periodic (or even ad hoc) basis, IT is a great industry to be in. In fact, IT is so flexible, it’s quite possible to run a business you’re your home, dorm room, or garage. Just look at Apple and Dell! #8: Variety in pacing Most IT work jobs are cyclical. They all have a different rhythm, but it is there. They go from being insane, 60-hour-a-week jobs for two months at the end of the project to “in-the-office vacations” at other times in the project cycle. Some IT pros get the constant rush like in any other profession, but most of us get a pace that swings between insanely busy and snoozefest. This keeps the job from getting boring. The caveat here is that some employees are stuck in high gear with few pauses, which leads to burnout. But I would rather fight being overworked than struggle with having nothing to do. #9: Geography IT is not an industry dominated by a particular city, region, or country. The U.S. IT market has a lot of workers from other countries. On the flip side, if you want to see the world, IT can be your ticket. Even if you are domestically minded, IT has a strong presence in many hip, cool towns like New York City, San Francisco, Seattle, Dallas, Austin, and Atlanta. If you’re looking to move off the farm and into the Big City, IT can do that for you. But the demand is widespread enough so that if you want to work in a less urban area, there is plenty of opportunity to do so as well. #10: Pay day Hey, let’s be real. Despite the grumbling, IT pros are well compensated, especially after taking into account the high percentage of them without college degrees or even certifications. Would I work in IT if it paid like other professions? I sure would. Nevertheless, it is awesome to be paid pretty well to do work you love surrounded by great people.